So I’m Northern, so what? – No.3. I’ve had enough Londoners up my arse to form a small community.

In fact, my arse should appear on a new revised version of the British map because in terms of population size it’s right up there with Romford, Cheshunt and Broxbourne. What is this need to be right up my backside when I’m waiting for a bus, boarding a bus or on the bus? [...]